RHN Biolife Report: Nerf

The severely under appreciated Nerf of Alderaan receives not nearly as much praise as it deserves for being the most adaptable and delicious animal in the galaxy. According to recent surveys conducted by the Republic Census Bureau, the Nerf is the most profitable meat in the galaxy. Over nine thousand companies are solely dedicated to processing Nerf meat, with several mega-corporations like Czerka branching into the lucrative business, finding it more stable and more profitable then arming a fledgling government gearing up for war.

A Nerf's grace does not lie in its appearance and temperament. Indeed, they are unpleasant creatures to handle. The males are aggressive, often leading them to trample their own younglings and the females of their species, leading any smart herder to keep the males in separate pens. Their stench is only rivaled by the unkempt appearance of their fur and the build-up of dried spittle which accumulates around their mouth areas as they graze and chew cud. The pitch colored saliva is acidic in nature and almost impossible to remove once dried, leaving most Nerf herders with minor burns around their hands and forearms mostly due to the fact that it only removes itself from clothing after it slowly burns through the material.

It would be foolish to classify the Nerf as a stupid animal, however. With its adaptability comes several subspecies, including the leaner, mottled-fur Forest Nerf which has become a favorite pet for farmers from the Core to the Outer Rim for their docile appearance and expressive nature. In environments that even a Bantha cannot survive because of it's lumbering nature and minimal intelligence, a Nerf will thrive, albeit with a slightly rebellious, unruly streak which it will exhibit during seasonal shedding to it's keeper.
Recently, due to their galactic importance, both Imperial (Read more...)


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